Animal Sacrifice, Food Poisoning, Closures, Frog Whispering

I have my students write in their journals on Monday mornings to chronicle their weekends and to practice grammar, spelling and handwriting. Most kids write about going to movies, playing with friends and other mundane activities. One little girl submitted a copy that caught me by surprise. In summation:

“…On Saturday we had to make the sheep die. When a new baby comes, a sheep has to die. My dad cut the sheep and it made a noise, moved a bit and died. The bloods got on the ground, but it was not that much bloods. After the sheep died we ate lunch and I played with my sisters…”

I had to correct her usage of ‘bloods’, teaching her not to pluralize the word, but it was otherwise a perfectly written journal. I got to learn, too; I didn’t know that Muslims sacrificed a sheep when a child was born. Some other things that I’ve learned is that you get ‘same pinched’ for wearing the same color as someone else, Justin Beiber is a polarizing figure among 7 year olds and a ‘long toilet’ is code for going #2.

My stomach issues eventually settled after adjusting to the food, but I ate ting momos with yak cheese at a Bhutanese/Tibetan restaurant this past weekend, and it ended poorly. Later that evening, I couldn’t sleep as my heart was beating rapidly. Heartburn subsequently set in, and at about five in the morning it all came up. The next day I was extremely ill and the extent of my food intake was two slices of plain bread and an extremely small portion of plain rice. I was so nauseous that I couldn’t watch TV or do anything but writhe around in bed and battle the urge to vomit. That evening, her mom gave me a shot of vodka, thinking that the alcohol would settle my stomach, and I woke up the next morning feeling more or less normal. I had never had food poisoning before, and wouldn’t wish it upon my worst enemy. Watch what you eat.

School was affected by more political problems this week. I was woken up on Monday to learn that a ‘bandh’ had been called and that I had to set the phone tree in motion so that everyone heard about it. Of course, someone botched up the phone tree and I spent over an hour calling kids. These closures are bad news for everyone, as they affect everything and the entire day is essentially a waste. The schools have to close as protesters have ransacked them in the past, putting teachers and students in harm’s way. As much as I get annoyed with the partisan American system, I am grateful that a) we have a government, and b) it is stable.

I have recently been sleeping in the household sitting area, as Shehrish’s brother returned from boarding school for the summer and I had been in his room. I like my new room, as it’s much cooler than being upstairs and stays darker in the mornings, but the only problem is the nightly symphony of frog noise. I mentioned it one morning, and Shehrish's mother recommended that I speak to the frogs and kindly suggest that they cease croaking at night. She swears up and down that one time she kindly asked a rat to leave the household, and afterwards it never came back. I was obviously skeptical of such a phenomenon and sarcastically asked whether to address the frogs in English or Nepali. Later, to make a mockery of her animal whisperings, I made my request to the frogs and apologized for the recent massacre of their tadpoles (the fish pond was cleaned recently, eliminating millions of tiny tadpoles). I didn't ask for the frogs to leave, but simply to keep it down after 11. We went to a party and came back last night around 12. Much to my chagrin, the frogs were silent. By all means, it should have been a noisy night, as it was drizzling and they're most active when it rains. I slept peacefully throughout the night and didn't hear one croak. Shehrish's mom has been gloating and making fun of me all day, but I refuse to believe unless the trend continues for two more nights. I have made a similar request to the mosquitoes just in case I am wrong.

Corruption, Rituals, Sweetmeats, Mad Men, Heat (temperature and Miami), etc.

I went to immigration this week to extend my visa. The initial tourist visa is for 90 days, and can be extend twice for a total of 150 days. On the internet, the price of an extension is listed at Rs. 3500 (I think), $50 USD, but I ended up paying Rs. 5500. The actual cost of the extension was Rs. 4500, although it wasn’t listed anywhere, and I had to pay Rs. 1000 in juice to ‘make things go smoothly’. Per instruction, I crumpled up two Rs. 500 notes and quickly handed them off to an immigration officer as if I were making a drug transaction. My extension was than quickly given to me without hassle. Hooray for bribery and corruption!

I am reluctantly attending a ceremony for one of my students this weekend, a Newari ritual/celebration where we celebrate her symbolic marriage to a fruit. I say ‘reluctantly’ because I cannot envision another scenario where I would feel more out of place. The only other people attending that I know are my other second graders, so I plan on brushing up on my 7-8 year old pop culture in order to have things to talk about. They like Justin Beiber, Hannah Montana and Pokemon, which I thought I still knew lots about from secretly being obsessed with through 8th grade until a student made fun of me for not knowing what or who a ‘Kirem’ was. It’s hard to believe that Pokemon is still relevant in today’s world. I still remember finding it hysterical when a Christian organization called for the banning of pokemon products because the pokemon evolve, heaven forbid.

The weather has gotten hotter, which turns my classroom into a makeshift sauna. I consume around 3 liters of water on an average workday to stay hydrated. The kids still run around and play during recess, and come back from playing drenched in sweat and thoroughly exhausted. I get most of the heavy teaching/working done before lunch, as afterwards the kids have no focus. I conduct lots of word games and math bingo in the afternoon to trick them into learning and maintain their interest. Things have been going well; one of my students recently was accepted to British school, which apparently is rather prestigious. His mother told me that the exam consisted of all the things I had been teaching, and it was reassuring to hear that I'm not leading today's youth off of a metaphorical cliff.

I’ve decided that Indian sweets, or ‘sweetmeats’, are one of the best things to eat in the world. Two of my students have recently given me boxes of them to celebrate the birth of a new sibling and I think ‘ladoos’ are my favorite. I would describe them as bright orange balls that crumble into little pellets upon being eaten, and they have a subtle, sugary sweetness that gives them addictive qualities similar to crack and Jersey Shore. Once I devoured my supply I quickly hit up Anmol Sweets and discovered ‘jalebi’ and ‘gulab jamum’. Both are much sweeter and less addictive, as eating too many would result in awful indigestion. I hope that my newfound adoration of sweets doesn’t stifle my weight loss, but I have to walk 10-15 minutes both ways to get them, so I should be okay.

I was left without any mindless entertainment at nighttime after Dexter ran its course. I gave its replacement, Castle, a shot before quickly realizing that it may be the most insufferable cop show ever made. To fill the void, I ended up reading a historical fiction trilogy about Alexander the Great, which was nice, but no substitute for mindless entertainment. Shehrish was than given Mad Men by a friend, and I finally have a new, good show to waste my time on (sorry, Dexter). It’s set in New York circa 1960, and is all about the advertising world and how office life ran back then. It’s gratuitously misogynistic but wildly entertaining. I find it amazing that anything got done in that time period given the amount of alcohol that the protagonists consume throughout an average workday. If you need a new show, check out Mad Men; you won’t be disappointed.

The UEFA final was a couple of Saturdays ago, and was aired live at 12:30 am, technically on Sunday I guess. Being much later than most people stay out, everyone was rowdy and fairly inebriated, which made for a fun match. I was the sole supporter of Barca and it was great being the sole ManU antagonist. A couple of United supporters made ill advised even money wagers with me, so the night was both exciting and profitable. As expected, Barca carved them up and Messi further cemented his legacy as one of the greatest ever. I hope that soccer catches on in the US, it's a great product and I think the moments of excitement are unparalleled. But alas, it probably wont, as football is too huge and Americans love scoring.

The Mavericks have shocked me and are leading the NBA Finals 3 games to 2. I thought that Miami would win in 5 or 6 after Lebron dismantled the Bulls while making Derrick Rose look average, but apparently not. I am in the minority of people who don’t hate Lebron James, even though I hated The Decision, wanting him to make it work in Cleveland or becoming a superpower in New York, LAC or even Chicago (although in hindsight I'm glad he didn't come to Chicago, as Rose wouldn't have emerged). I don’t like LB J as a person either, but as a basketball fan it’s sad to watch such an amazing talent playing second fiddle to Dwyane Wade, who himself is incredible but not as talented as Lebron. A player as gifted as James choking in the clutch and falling short is just weird to see. I hope Dallas wins as I like Dirk and I hate Miami, but part of me wants to see Lebron explode for a 45-12 in the next two games and realize his potential. I woke up at 6 to see game 5 on Friday morning, and plan on doing it for the rest of the series. Go Dallas.